(Slightly belated) New Year motoring resolutions | USAEMALL.com

Olga’s away and it’s time to play. Yay!

With Motoring Editor Olga de Moeller on leave, and me sliding into the driver’s seat for a couple of weeks, I’m going to get a few things off my chest… with these (Slightly Belated) New Year Resolutions.

1

I’m going to continue talking and writing about Team Driving. What’s that? When you’re next behind the wheel, be totally aware of the vehicles within a 25m radius of yours – and consider them part of your team, rather than competitors. Imagine your mum’s in the little i30 and your brother is in the Prado. Your sister’s in the Carnival with all your nephews and nieces, and dad’s having his midlife crisis in the Tesla. You let them in, they let you in. You look after them, they look after you. Imagine that we are all just trying to get to our destinations as easily and comfortably as possible, with no damage, injuries… or stress. Team Driving is life changing (and, I’d suggest, life saving.)

2

Not only will I not be distracted by the increasing number of very bright digital billboard screens that are appearing, specifically to draw the attention of drivers, but I will stop moaning about them. Even though, to quote the Australian Road Safety Foundation: “Driver distraction is a leading cause of road accidents in Australia, contributing to thousands of injuries and fatalities each year… driver distractions are anything that diverts attention from the task of driving… visual distractions take your eyes off the road. Apparently “commercial visual distractions” are just fine.

3

And I will stop moaning about noisy motorcycles, even though we have this crazy little thing called ADR83/00. It is the Australian Design Rule that defines the limits on external noise generated by cars and bikes. It requires manufacturers to meet “drive-by” noise limits (about 94dB for road-going bikes from 1984 onwards). But apparently it’s fine to take a bike’s muffler off and put an aftermarket one on, to make more noise.

4

I will never, ever stop in the right lane at traffic lights and put my indicator on to turn right after they have changed to green.

5

I will never, ever try to turn right onto Stirling Highway – across two lanes “coming my way”, and two the other way. I have seen too many crashes and near misses. My horror-nightmare-scenario is being T-boned (hit side-on, in the driver door) – and I honestly can’t think of a place more likely than coming out of Princes Street in Mosman Park, and trying to turn right onto Stirling towards Fremantle. I’d rather turn left and wriggle round the block.

6

I was going to make one resolution that I’ll always wear full safety gear on my motorcycle every day – but, quite honestly, it’s just not going to happen. There will be lapses.

7

Every time someone complains about their car “binging and bonging”, I’m going to patiently explain that those are warnings about safety systems, so it’s a good thing. Yes, I know if you ignore them for long enough, they will sometimes go away, but you have paid for all that safety tech, so you must want it, so why wouldn’t you use it. Right?

8

When I am changing a wheel because I have a flat tyre and someone asks if they can film it in case they ever need to, I will let them. It happened recently – a young woman who asked “are you allowed to do that?” She honestly thought only patrol people in a yellow van were allowed to. (If you’ve never done it, and are planning a road trip, it’s worth finding a solid, flat spot and practicing some time.)

9

I will continue to rant about people playing loud, aggressive music in cars. It seem to me that being pumped by that (having it in your “bloodstream”) could be just about as dangerous as taking other substances. I have the full, scholarly report of a study which analysed the results of 19 other studies (in high-income countries). The meta-analysis results indicated that music with high and medium volume increases the average driving speed, and music with low volume decreases it. It was concluded that, in some indicators, listening to music has adverse effects on driving. But it can also improve driving safety if calmer music and lower volumes are selected.

10 I will accept that the new Smart Mitchell Freeway Southbound between Hester Avenue and Vincent Street IS actually smart, in its own way. (Just as a driver who asks “how do I remember to use mirrors and indicators?” is smart.)