I had only three days to prepare for the screen test and audition, which wasn’t as much time as I’d like. So I tried to go as broad as possible, and then shrink it down and go as specific as possible in finding and discovering where it is that I, as Lewis, can relate to this character.
Where did you pull from?
What was so exciting and terrifying was how much I related to this character. In terms of the mental health parts of it, the anxiety and the depression, I have a good healthy dose of O.C.D., and just self-doubt and that negative self-talk that can paralyze you. I’m lucky to have come from a great family that was very proactive and resourceful about helping me figure it all out. And so to try to inhabit somebody who didn’t have that — I was close enough to those alleyways to be able to see what it would have looked like had I not had those.
Have you had candid conversations with people in your own life about mental health?
I was a social work major in college in North Carolina, and so I have had many conversations about these topics. Coming into this project, it was obvious that it was a major theme. But it was never our goal to make this a P.S.A. This is still an incredibly fun, large-scale blockbuster film. But by shining a flashlight on it, it becomes more real. In many ways, my anxiety is something I’m grateful for. It’s there as a protective mechanism. You don’t just make a movie about it, and then the conversation’s over. I’ll be talking about it until I circle the drain. And that’s something I’ve come to be OK with and embrace.
Do you also have personal experience with depression?
That’s something that’s less of a consistent force in my life. It comes in waves. But it’s something that’s deep in my marrow because, when you feel that, it’s very hard to forget. I was able to tap into that in a way that was safe, with therapy, and then friends and support.
I go about therapy in the same way that I go about acting — I assume that I never know anything, that there’s always something to learn. I did a lot of cognitive behavioral therapy in high school, and now I’m in talk therapy. I’ve realized that the times when you should stick with therapy the most is when you think you’re doing the best without it. That’s a mind game that I’ve fallen for a couple of times.
Why do you think the character has resonated with people?
That oscillation that he has between feeling this worthlessness, met with this true belief in yourself, is very resonant. That’s something important about Bob: He wants to be of use, but he’s been told his whole life that when he tries to get involved, he always makes things worse. A lot of us have been told that, in one way or another. And so to see this very real person amongst these surreal and extraordinary circumstances is what makes it so resonant.
